Tuesday, 25 September 2018

Finding Balance

So this week we saw in the autumnal equinox and as Robert Macfarlane [@RobGMarfarlane] reminds
us, this symbolises a time of balance in the grander scheme of life and the earth as a whole. It’s a concept
I understand but can’t quite explain - I feel very much in touch with the seasons as an ecotherapy
practitioner but how does one put that into words without sounding like one is trying to set up a
commune, ahha.

Well, since I saw that beautiful photo and read those words the word ‘balance’ has been consistently on
my mind - it’s on my mind because I can’t seem to find it and I wondered if anyone else felt the same

We are constantly told to find a work/life balance, a personal balance were we give only as much as we
can to others (you can’t drink from an empty cup); a balance wherein self care is prevalent. I am failing -
I always have failed on this, I fail even though I don’t have a job, I’m not studying, I don’t have my own
family… I can’t find balance within myself - I sometimes believe I don't deserve to either, I am a failure.

Even now, as I write this I am sitting in my room preparing to do some home yoga practice to find that
inner peace, to create some time for my body and soul to connect and help me find stillness. But I am
doubtful I can get it to work today, something’s off.

This is just a post on honesty, truth. I am struggling and I despise even typing it never mind admitting it
as true. These periods come and go with me, a symptom of my illness, and I know I’ll be okay again
soon. I haven’t been to the allotment, I haven’t seen anyone but Andrew and Toby, I am falling way
behind in housework and even in self-care. I just needed to talk, I just needed to confess….thank you
for listening, I hope you are achieving balance - if you are, teach me how.

Love and hugs


  1. No I don't achieve a balance either. I am only really happy when those around me are happy and this seems to be something I can't control. I need a magic wand!

    You are not a failure Carrie - that thought is just a symptom of your illness.

  2. I doubt if few people ever truly find a personal balance in life, or only for periods not long-term. Life in general is always a bit of a roller-coaster for most of us.
    Take care, and hugs. xx

  3. Given how many people blog about finding the balance - we all battle to do it. (Not working, no kids or parents to care for ... and I still battle to keep up)


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